Friday, December 12, 2008

Damn Lists

OK, I'm back on the list train. I made three separate and totally packed lists. One is for our packing, one is for shopping and baking/cooking for Saturday, and one is for all the cleaning I have to do before Saturday. I really should make some more coffee.

Monday, December 8, 2008

Sleep

Who's having it? Not me, that's for damn sure. I just know after this little expedition that we are on, I will never taking sleeping all night for advantage. I'm excited because I just got 4 hours. Damn, I gonna look like crap today.

Saturday, December 6, 2008

Ok, I have some time on my hands

http://theonlythingtofearisfearitself.blogspot.com/

As you may or may not know, I am an avid reader of Cracked.com That site gives me hours of entertainment. They have such random listings and postings and usually forward them on to you guys. Yesterday, they had a little hodgepodge of postings that really didn't fit in anywhere. In there was the guys irrational fear of toilets. This lady decided, what better to do with her time than make a blog of people's irrational fears. The link is above and what they have so far is GENIUS!!! I am currently trying to figure out which of my irrational fears is the craziest. Once I know, I'll post it.

In the mean time, what are your irrational fears?

Friday, December 5, 2008

I Should Have Waited

Ahh, yes the immortal words, that are normally followed by, I should have known better. In this case, I should have in both accounts. The kids and I have been grocery shopping for ourselves, by ourselves, but quite a long time at this point. Every time is a different experience. Some days the kids are horrible and they just cry and cry for no reason. Other times, they are the most helpful babies ever.


Yesterday started out great. The kids found and picked out their banana's and apples and other fruits that they wanted. Sadly, that only lasted two aisles of them being great. I strapped them into the little car and turned my back to pick out some noodles. Thanks, to the Wonder Pets, my kids are all about teamwork. They unbuckled each other and they were off!! There were stocking carts everywhere, so the kids were weaving through them with expertise. I was moderately OK with that. Nobody else was in the aisle except for the one stocker and they were laughing and having fun. What I didn't count on was Anna's response to Gagey beating her down the aisle. She ran full speed and tackled him straight into a cart loaded with open boxes. My head dropped in defeat. I looked up and two full boxes of boxes of mac and cheese were all over the floor. Both Anna and Gagey stood up and said "Uh oh". They stood up and looked around at the hundred or so boxes and they just laughed and there was so crying from Gagey. He had, after all, knocked all of those over with just his head.


Of course the store came to an absolute standstill and everybody within three aisles came to see what the commotion was. Anna, Gagey and I start trying to fix this mess. I am bright bright red and then the stock man came and said it would be best if we just went along and continued our shopping. He may have said that because it was his job and he was being nice. Or, most likely, he saw both Anna and Gagey kicking the boxes further down and out of the aisle and just wanted us gone.

I could have waited to go to the store. Jonathan will be home soon. In fact so soon that I didn't have to go to the store yesterday. We could have made it until then with the amount of milk we had. But no, I wanted to be the good wife and have everything absolutely perfect. I hope he appreciates what it takes to have normal things like a stocked fridge and enough fruit to survive the apocalypse. He better appreciate, I think I'm going to have him take both kids to the store by himself and I'll just take a nap. That, my friend, is the ultimate reward.

(OK, maybe not the ultimate reward. Having him home is the top of my list, but you get the point)

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

When life gives you lemons. Say fuck the lemons and bail.

I'm trying to bail, but I'm not going anywhere. I got so fixated on this one damn day and when you hear its not, its like my whole world just kinda collapsed.

I'm done, just really done this time.

I don't want to talk about it.

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Burnt Out

I am exhausted and tired and so so so close.

I've been able to hold it together this long and now I feel myself slipping more everyday. I know when he is coming home and I know that everything will be amazing when he gets here. Its just getting to that point is killing me. I can't eat, I can't sleep and all I think about is making everything perfect.

I understand that he doesn't care if the house if perfect, I do. I also understand that he wants me to calm down and relax. But what I don't understand is how. I really don't.

I'll be fine. Just one night of sleep longer than 3 hours, and my outlook on life would improve. Until then, just coffee and more coffee. Trying to stay awake to watch the kids and then clean some more.